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The Scripture says, "Where
there is no vision,
the people perish" (Proverbs 29: 18 KJV). Vision as defined in the
dictionary of Contemporary English is "the knowledge and inspiration
that
are needed in planning for the future with a clear purpose."
Vision has two dimensions:
The present dimension
and the future dimension. It is the present knowledge of how the future
will
look like. What connects these two dimensions is the purpose of the
person
having the vision. The purpose that one has in taking an action will
determine
the type of knowledge he will acquire and how he will apply the acquired
knowledge with persistence until his dream is realised.
Home building is not out of
the realm of planning
and vision. In fact, it is a visionary man and woman vis-à-vis the home
building can have good and enduring success in life. Indeed, they will
live a
happy and fulfilled life.
Need For
a Complete Vision
For a husband and wife to
succeed in building their
home, they must have visions concerning their spiritual lives, training
of
their children and financial success. However, their visions in these
areas
must synchronised with the overall vision of the family. That is,
building of a
stable and godly home where godly children are raised.
This is the purpose of
marriage. It follows then
that if one has a vision on one aspect of family life and succeed in
that area,
he may not be fulfilled if he fails in other areas. For example, if one
have a
vision to build a rich and wealthy family and he succeeds, he may not be
fulfilled
if he does not train his children in the way of the Lord.
There is no way he can train
his children in the
way of the Lord when he is not having proper personal relationship with
God as
one cannot offer what he doesn’t have. Experience has shown that ungodly
children always destroy the heritage of their parents.
Timely
Planning
It is instructive to note
here that the right time
that a man and woman should settle the issue of vision for their family
is
during their courtship. The two partners in courtship need to settle
down to
consider each other’s vision and see how they could blend together.
They must develop workable
vision for their future
family. This vision need to be broken into smaller units. For example:
their
relationship with God, the number of children they want to have, the way
they
will train their children, the way they will handle their finances. Is
there
any hope of establishing a joint family business?
The truth is that if partners
in courtship can
settle down to plan as highlighted above, many marriages could not have
been
consummated because the partners in courtship could have quit the
relationship
on realising that there is no way the two of them can live together in
harmony.
For example, a situation
where a man decides to have
at least five children because his father has twelve children while a
lady
cannot have more than two children based on medical advice. If these two
individual want to be frank with each other, they will separate happily
at
courtship stage when this issue is discussed. This is better than
glossing over
this aspect and forces themselves into marriage that can never work.
On the other hand, a man that
desires that his wife
should maintain a joint account with him has failed already if he
marries a
woman who has been indoctrinated never to have anything to do in common
with
her husband.
Commitment
is
a Must
One thing is to set have a
good vision. Another
thing is to apply oneself to realising the vision. Husband and wife must
be
totally and mutually committed into achieving the vision that they set
for the
family. This calls for sacrifice of certain things on the part of both
husband
and wife. Any couple that cannot sacrifice the identified obstacles to
realising their vision of building a happy home cannot succeed in their
marriage.
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